Mmm. Tangy.

My Horrible Ode to a Horrible Assignment

2012-01-31T14:58:00.001-05:00

I hate you, paper. I don’t care why I want to write about you. Why the bleep would I want to explore for 4 pages WHY I’m interested in this topic – I want to write about what I’ve actually found! I hate you with a petty vengeance. I’m going to kill you after I’m finished with you in April. You will die by fire and I will make it slow and painful. You. Will. Burn.

Tang, Annette Marie Bailey. "My Horrible Ode to a Horrible Assignment." Mmm. Tangy. Tang, Annette Marie Bailey. Ann Arbor, MI: Google Blogger, 2012. 1/4 pages. Blog.

PS. I hate you.

Memories of Bangor

2011-09-19T20:14:00.000-04:00

Bangor was the city where I became an adult. I made the very best and absolute worst decisions of my life there. I can't imagine who I'd be without it.

When I go back, the very first thing I do is drive around to my favorite places - which brings up a lot of memories along the way. It also helps to fill in the fading map in my head. This time I wrote them down as I passed in case I should one day forget them. My father-in-law made the outstanding suggestion that I take pictures as well. Awesome idea. Blame him if you get sick of my face. I know I do and am. I'll start out with the things with no photo to give your computer more time to load.

I will not be offended if you scan...

Wind, because it's not the cold that's gonna kill you.

Motorcycles, classic cars, muscle cars and sports cars. People in Maine know cool transportation better than anyone else.

Hot guys with...less hot chicks. You see it everywhere. Bizarre.

Dysart's. Countless breakfasts eaten in the wee hours of the night because there's no where else for underage kids to go in the winter. Santa Claus' legs in the chimney. "Butter me up, I'm going in!"

Staring. Seriously. Walk, drive, limp or crawl by - just come into view and you'll get every set of male eyes (and often their whole upper body) following you and at least a few "Hey baby...Hey sexy... how you doing...got a name? a number? you want some companionship or are you all set? My number is..." All variations are apparently acceptable. Good for the ego. Bad for a lone woman in remote locations.

Ethan Frost, at age 7 (now studying history in college) during Sunday School - "Annie, I don't want to talk about Jesus. I want to talk about dinosaurs."

DeeDee Amero requesting that I not twist my ankles out while I'm teaching because it made her skin crawl.

Dennis Wagner - Elvis in the chapel and twisting my arm for teasing Matt. Now pretends not to remember me. Prick.

Pulling the fire alarm at church by accident...and running full tilt in the opposite direction.

Doing donuts in my Toyota Corolla in frozen parking lots. Wee.

Laughing with Morrigan about some of the ridiculous lyrics to old hymns. I am purposely not looking them up.

The cellar doors at Chez Tang where I got my mountain bike everyday one summer.

Where I rode my bike every day. It could be longer, but still a good trail.

(My face is showing incredulity at the whistles from a passing truck.)

Home. The tree house I painted yellow, blue and green...which is still those colors. See the sun room? That was mine. So nice. So warm. No wind.

Bangor Pool. A girl who stole my cool baggy pants. Stephen King helped the city build a new one, obviously they filled in the old one. :(

West Broadway - a few blocks from home, the coolest houses in Bangor and Stephen King's house. That's it behind me. (I'm looking at a couple of kids as they drove by yelling "Hot da**!" Couldn't help but smile at that.)

Hammond St - Penobscot Valley School of Gymnastics, my first job after high school...not the first time I was fired for going on vacation instead of going to work. It's now a flooring and tile store.

Gum on my shoe means gum on my gas pedal. Ice works.

My first apartment in the run down mansion of an old sea captain. So cool and so sad...like so many parts of Bangor.

Bangor Public Library. Coolest library I've ever had the pleasure of having a card to.

The house on Fourth - spent two months here one summer before going to Edmonton in 2006...in a one bedroom apartment. That's the bay window in our living room.

Shaw's on Main - kept Stephanie from working on a regular basis.

Paul Bunyan - Matt defying the "Do Not Climb" sign in order to recline on the poor man's shoe.

1A to Hampden - Russ' grandparents house...and though I did not witness it, dancing in the mirror. Also the time when Russ was back from California for a few months and we had no one but ourselves to do cool stuff with - tons o' fun.

Penobscot river - where I sat very melancholy and said farewell to Bangor for over an hour, only leaving because I was over an hour late getting home. I was very reluctant to leave my Bangor for Edmonton. Turned out alright, but still.

Where Jared's car got hit by a drunk guy and begged by the guy's friend not to report it. "He has a lot of money - look at his truck. He'll pay for all your damages out of pocket...it's just that he's been drinking a little..."

Greyhound bus stop - picking up Chais when he came to visit. And that I told him to bring up a tent and we'd go camping...which we never did.

Robinson Ballet - site of my last ballet class. (my face shows me getting tired of taking pictures of myself)

A quick moment to photograph my rented wheels. Chevy Impala. Enough space in the trunk to hide 3-4 bodies lying almost straight out. Just sayin.

Where I got my first taste of India (heh, heh, heh). Thanks Matt! I've been obsessed ever since. Yum.

4:20 - Around long before they legalized medical marijuana, not that I've ever been there.

The bottom floor used to be a coffee shop where my acting career began and ended. I was in a commercial for maybe a full second talking over coffee to some girl I didn't know. Also, Ryan worked here for two weeks when he got back from California.

Used to be the Grasshopper Shop and still sells the same stuff. Where Matt used to work and a confusing matter of $60.

The Al Brady Plaque - Bangor's proud heritage. And my feet.

The canal running through downtown. Beautiful. Old. In need of repair. Everything I love about Bangor.

Children's Museum. Close enough to the apartment on Fourth that we walked here often.

Lifelong fear of flipping backwards in a car from steep hills (very logical, I know). I avoided this street like the plague.

Cascade park - where Morri and I made complete fools of ourselves with my dad's camera.

Bangor mall - "I'll bang you in a minute." Also buying the exact same Doc Marten's as Elder Randall winter 1999. Which reminds me of our Christmas Eve dinner where we waited so long for Mom and Dad to get back from who-knows-where that we ordered pizza.

Oriental jade - Hostessing...and the rice incident I discovered was true.

Not possible to pin down one memory because we were here all the time, but they do come in groups. Matt, Tavia, Jared, Russ and the rest of 'em - Becky and Stephanie - Shaun's first job.

Above and beyond all other memories is...Matt. He introduced me to Bull Moose and the only time I ever went was with him. It was his home away from home. And now the site where I bought my first Dropkick Murphy's CD (and tried to get Street Dogs but they only had them on vinyl. No joke).

The site formerly known as Home Depot - keeping Becky from working, though it was harder than with Stephanie. And the impressive handling you get in a rented Chevy Impala...

General Aviation Terminal - My daddy and the purchase of my Toyota Corolla for $500.

Applebees - The only place Becky will eat.

900C Hammond Street- OpenCube's formerly secret location.

The site of the restaurant where Ryan Calogero and I ate before prom and ran into Tavia and Russ. Now the location of the coolest lounge in Bangor. Go here if you can manage it. Great quesadillas and an even greater bar tender. L'Aperitif. Tres chic.

Bangor Opera House. Spent a week helping backstage at a youth ballet performance. It was here I discovered that Mainers wear jeans to the ballet.

Tavia - middle of the night, something about the waitress.

West Park - Russ banging his head on the bar and Tavia's inability to stop laughing. (This was where the man was asking if I was "in need of companionship or if I was all set." He repeated his phone number for me about 10 times and followed me on his bike for 3 blocks. Makes a girl feel secure, you know?)

Morri and I stopped here briefly to change dresses. Don' know why or where we were going, just that we did it.

This picture does not do the hill justice - especially because this is only the straight portion. The curvy part is just as steep and fun...except in the winter.

This house is even longer than it is wide. One day I will kick out all the kiddies and make it my private residence...and put all those power lines UNDERGROUND!

Thomas Hill stand pipe. Overlooks all of Bangor. Nathan used to practice rock climbing around the base. Our dog, Fozzie, came here whenever he got out. I ran here quite often.

Kenduskeag Stream. Made out with Clarence here winter '99.

Nathan and I rock jumping after getting my hair done for prom, and the homeless guy who flashed me and Becky from across the stream. She has blocked the memory, but it still happened.

You may find this strange, but I love cemeteries and the Mount Pleasant Catholic Cemetery in Bangor is the reason why. We lived a few blocks over so I saw it all the time. If I were Catholic I would be buried here - in the back with all the 200+ year old graves.

Only the coolest part of the whole place. Really wish I could get in.

I have to fight the poetic urge when I'm at this place. It's a truly beautiful cemetery.

I also brought Nancy and Clarence here one winter, not realizing they are both very scared of cemeteries. When I found out I gave them a copy of Night of the Living Dead for Christmas. I'm thoughtful like that.

This was NOT one of my favorites. If I'd been with someone else I MAY have gone over to peek down that OPEN GRAVE, but as I was alone I chose the better part of valor.

There are a lot of graves back in the woods near the ravine that I'd never seen before. They were super cool and kinda creepy.

Please plant a hydrangea tree next to my headstone so I can have something pretty to look at when I visit my rotting bones.

Not sure why I love this one.

Obviously I have a thing for antiquities. My favorites are all the oldest.

While taking pictures around town I saw signs for The Shamrock-N-Roll Fest on the waterfront. Looked like fun so I changed and went around 6pm. Street Dogs came on soon after I got there - I met Mike McColgan after their set while I was perusing their t-shirts, though it was a minute or two after we were shooting the breeze that I realized who he was and why he seemed to think I should have a lot to say to him. He's awesome despite the awkward conversation - better stage presence than the Murphy's, who he used to sing for but quit to be a firefighter in Boston before starting the Street Dogs. They're coming to Detroit in December and I intend to be there.

The Mahones. They are, apparently, iconic. Guess you had to be there from the beginning, cuz they just sounded loud and unpolished to me.

Very good. Between Street Dogs and Dropkick Murphy my $35 ticket felt cheap.

Zoe is her mother's daughter. Good work Becky!

Zane, age 2, is a good little photographer! Becky and I (and the kids) played Wii Fit all night and all morning. The balance games are more difficult than you'd think!

Zane caught me packing up to get back to Bangor for moussaka with Michelle.

I sat here for ages on Friday afternoon before meeting Tess and Tyne for dinner. If the Kenduskeag was less polluted I'd have put more than my feet in it.

This concludes my trip to Bangor. I spent four days in Fairfield but only took one picture. Morrigan would probably send me a box of dog poo if I posted it but we plastered, sanded, primed and cooked for four days. Best four days I've had in ages.
The End.

Sunflowers!

2010-08-11T17:28:00.004-04:00

Last year while weeding (this is seldom done and worthy of note) I vaguely recognized some of the weeds as actual plants, though I had not planted them myself. I puzzled over their identity for a few days until I noticed a similar looking, though far larger, sunflower stalk in the back yard. I had no idea why there were four in my front yard (or one in my back yard) and concluded that the squirrels must have planted some of the seeds my neighbor is always giving them. I decided to encourage their growth and watered them when the mood struck me. As they blossomed I fell right in love with the huge, cheery faces and really wanted to know what kind they were so I could plant more of them the next year - but you can't ask a squirrel.

And besides that they began tearing the flowers to shreds as soon as the seeds ripened. In a blind panic I managed to channel the pioneer spirit of my ancestors and lopped off the remains of a flower head to dry the seeds. (I let the squirrels have the rest - even though they made a huge mess of them)
This year I started a ridiculous number of them inside and when I tried to harden them off some nasty little bunny came and nibbled them down to nubs. Great. By this time I was on a sunflower trip and had planted about 15 of a larger variety directly into the ground as an experiment in the early spring and thought, as I had nothing to lose, I'd try the same with the shorter ones (I had a ton of seeds, as you can imagine). So I planted about 10 seeds directly into the ground along the front side of my fence and do you know they actually came up? They were glorious and I have often seen random passers-by stop to take pictures with their phones (ok so I only saw one Japanese girl but I figure there were probably more that I missed) Sadly, the squirrels began harvesting before I got any pictures, so the sunflowers pictured are of the larger sunflowers with Isaac and Lillian. Kind of anti-climactic right? Yep. I thought so too. But we take what we get and these are nothing to sneeze at, I think.

The heads are so big that when the seeds start to ripen some of them hang face down. I'm standing directly under this one. (the two black spots are bees, of which we have tons. I'd LOVE to find their honey stash someday.)

Sometimes I can't get them to stand still for pictures, but they cooperated enthusiastically this time!

What a Great Mother's Day!

2010-05-12T16:13:00.005-04:00

I just have to say that Mother's Day was great!

Especially because it started on Saturday when I and my great friend AnnMarie (who was back in town for her husband's graduation from dental school) went to Joe's Crab Shack for crawfish. This may not be a treat for some of you, but I NEVER get crawfish and was giddy to have them for the second time in one month!

We even remembered to get a picture together!

That's me sucking the head. As you can see, I'm not really sucking it. There are somethings even I won't do without a cash reward.

AnnMarie noted that it is perfectly fitting to become friends as workout partners only to have a last Hurrah on Mother's Day stuffing our faces, both a little fatter than we were before. (Curse those sympathy pounds!)

After Joe's we saw Date Night, which is a pretty funny little flick - one of those, laugh/cringe/cringe/laugh kind of movies. Me likey Steve and Tina. Bust me a gut.

The next day Clarence was on call and I was only a *little* late getting the kids to church - we still got a bench! (after the young men sat down we sat ALL THE WAY UP FRONT. I was feeling brave) They didn't do too bad actually, and Clarence showed up just after closing prayer so he took James to nursery - what a sweetie.

Since we weren't sure if Clarence was going to get called in or not we kept it simple with Taco Salad and Lemon Squares. He got to stay until 6pm! The kids picked out a pottery book for me on Clay and Glazes along with some Godiva Chocolates. (They only looked a little sad when Dad said they'd be eating M&Ms instead of the Godiva.)

I put the kids to bed at 7:30 and took a long, hot bath while I read a book (didn't drop it!), gave myself a pedicure, called my mom to wish her Happy Mother's Day and went to bed as soon as Clarence came home. Bliss.

Best Mother's Day ever!

AnnMarie

2010-04-19T09:58:00.003-04:00

My great friend, AnnMarie, has moved. I'm sad and lonely without them here so I thought I'd blog our story (ooh, sounds epic!) so she and everyone else knows just how much it sucks for me that she's gone. True to form, when I'm having fun I don't take pictures, so many important things to me don't get visual documentation unless someone else has a camera - you'll just have to imagine all this fun stuff.

We met when she and her husband, Logan, moved into our ward from across town two years ago and I was assigned to be her Visiting Teacher. We were both looking for a workout-partner and started meeting at the YMCA a few times a week. I wanted to lose about 30lbs and she wanted to lose about 3. Yes. 48oz. Fortunately for me, she loses weight slowly and has to work very hard while I shed weight like water through a sieve (or maybe yogurt through a sieve) once I actually start exercising, so we were moving along nicely. This time was also great because we both needed to vent about our husbands to someone who was sympathetic but knew we wanted to sort through our problems, not just complain. Plus, we often found ourselves thinking, "Hmm, I do that all the time..." when the other was complaining about their spouse and we realized that AnnMarie is the Clarence of her marriage and Logan is the Annie. It was great to give her some probable insight into where her husband is coming from and I was reminded that there is nothing wrong with Clarence (except that he's different from me). Despite it being a little surreal sometimes, I found being friends with the girl-version of my husband a lot of fun. It had the added benefit of reminding me that Clarence and I were really good friends first, and that was why we got married. Not that we're in a bad place, but it was a wonderful reminder.

The night before her son had a small surgery they came over for dinner (so she would neither have to cook or clean) and I wondered why her Visiting Teachers weren't helping her more. Something about that thought made me wonder when we'd met and after a few minutes (I know, I can be slow sometimes) it dawned on me that I was her Visiting Teacher and was glad I'd been there to help, even if I'd forgotten the responsibility! This was a great object lesson because Visiting Teaching is supposed to make friends of us and has been a big part of my renewed enjoyment in the calling.

Our kids loved it when the Curtis' came over. And even though I sometimes forgot her younger son has severe nut allergies until after he had the Honey Nut Cheerios in his mouth, I was always able to get the Benedryl into him before any major problems. (I did eventually stop feeding my kids peanut butter on days they were coming over) Her son, Levi, played a lot of house with Lillian, and her younger son, Isaac, played a lot of Kung Fu with James. They were perfectly suited and played exactly as you would expect kids of their ages to play (as in, Isaac and James threw a lot of punches and stole each other's toys and we watched Levi and Lillian to make sure they weren't kissing).

Then AnnMarie got pregnant and I, being the sympathetic friend that I am, decided to pretend I was pregnant, too. I got food cravings, took naps, and ate a lot of dessert. I actually began to wonder if I was pregnant We sat around most days working on our advent calendar, sewing aprons, making quiet books and alternately reporting good or complaining bad about the behavior of our husbands. I even gained weight along with her. Adding to the merging of our lives, her husband was stationed in North Carolina for his 6 year OMFS residency. Which means that along with friends in Raleigh and Chapel Hill, not to mention my brother in South Carolina, we have even more reasons for an extended vacation to the Carolina's, which is our favorite place in the States anyway. We've been pretty bummed at the prospect of her move this spring and three days after we made a commitment to lose those 10lbs we'd gained, there was a family emergency and they needed to move early. I got to see her at church for a bit (because James and Isaac ran off giggling while we were talking. Then we spent 10 minutes looking for them, only finding them by the sounds of crying and hitting coming from behind a closed door) and then they drove out of town and are somewhere between here and Utah. Now I not only have to find a babysitter for my pottery class today but I have to be my own workout motivation. Obviously that hasn't worked out well in the past.

Over the two years we knew each other we traded a lot of babysitting and shared a lot of dinners while our husbands (who are both dentist turned/turning oral surgeons) talked trauma, sutures and text books. We planted gardens, vacuumed vans, shared Costco trips, Holidays, sewing notions, park trips, ice cream, dogs, houseplants, garbage days, mail collection, toys, cleaning tips, recipes (and their accompanying ingredients), plants, cars, movies, laughs and of course a few tears (even though I'm not much of a crier. AnnMarie is though, plus she was pregnant so she couldn't help it). We've had a lot of fun and I will miss the closest thing to living near family I've had in many years until we are again living in the same town. Keep The Faith!

New Years!

2010-04-18T14:55:00.008-04:00

For consistency's sake, I'm going to blog about New Year's now that it's April. We went to Colorado Springs, CO to see my sister, Dana, and her family. Among the many activities were:

The Nerf Wars. Many battles over many days (many of which included Clarence, though there is no photographic evidence).

Even Lillian snatched a gun and got a few quick shots off before they sent her running.

Bradley was the champ, being more experience (and far taller) than the Tang boys.

Freezing buns off outside. They were out there at least an hour and a half. Too many Nerf darts to the head?

Dana cooking many lovely numinesses.

Sofia is a tough one to nab when she knows you intend to wipe her face. She's quicker than she looks!

Tackling Lillian's teeth with an unwelcome tooth brush. She didn't want to hold still for me but she sure laughed a lot while I did it for her!

The Self-Portrait Queen strikes her baby cousin. Haley has gotten VERY good at taking these babies!

Late night chatting. Dana and I exhausted ourselves into the wee hours of the morning, but what else do you do when you get together with your favorite sister?

Yeah, I know.

2009-12-13T21:27:00.006-05:00

So everyone else has long since posted their Halloween pictures, but I've had an exhausting fall semester and I'm just now thinking about how long it's been since I've blogged. I considered just jumping ahead to December but I had so much fun working on Lillian's face for Halloween I just had to share it with everyone!

I found all these great tutorials on YouTube for masks using eyeshadow and liquid eyeliner (which, by the way is SO not worth the effort it takes to get straight beautiful lines, not that I ever got any). She sat very still and loved the flowers so much she insisted on smaller versions for her school Halloween party.

The boys costumes were nice too. However, I forgot to get photos of them... does that make me a bad mom?

Family Formal

2009-09-18T11:51:00.011-04:00

I'm not sure where I heard about this, but someone told me about a woman who taught her kids about formal table manners by having a formal dinner at home. I've always thought this was a GREAT idea and have since been eagerly waiting for the time I think my kids are old enough to understand the purpose. (I think I heard about this as a teenager) So we spent a few FHE's (family night) on table manners and polite dinner conversation and then I printed up fancy invitations on the leftover blank Thank You notes from our wedding (yes, nine years ago).

Clarence helped the kids call me from the house phone to my mobile (I was in the bedroom) to "Let you know I got your invitation and would love to come to dinner on Thursday." It was so cute - I wish we'd thought to video it!

Planning dinner was the easest part because we are doing a dinner for Enrichment (an activity for the women at church) and I had wanted to try the menu out before we set it in stone.

Gougeres (cheese puffs made with choux paste and Gruyere)

Salad (a fancy one!)

Dilled Smoked Salmon on Wheat Toast

Roast Beef and Horseradish Cream on White Toast

French Onion Soup

Gouda

Bleu Cheese

Camembert

Plums

Kiwi

Ice Cream in Blood Orange Soda

Chocolate Cake (four layers!)

On Thursday, just before 6pm they all got dressed up (the boys' church clothes are in the laundry) and went out the side door, around to the front door and rang the bell. They were so cute!

The kids liked most of dinner, except the dill cream.

They were wary of the French Onion soup but did at least eat the bread and gruyere if not the all of the soup itself and liked all the cheese except the Bleu. Though Clarence likes it just fine!

(incidentally, for the activity, the gougeres and toasts will be switching places because we're not going to broil bread and gruyere on the soup but the gougeres have it and the toasts are more like appetizers anyway. The salmon will go on water crackers instead of toast and we will also have Pomegranate Soda with the Ice Cream - I know you're really interested :).

Dessert was fun - we don't often have fancy Italian sodas with ice cream! I don't have long handled spoons so we just used Bubble Tea straws to suck up the ice cream which worked surprisingly well!

This dinner also alerted me to the fact that I have no matching table linens or place settings so that has gone up on the "To Purchase Soon" list - bummer!!

As for their behavior (I got so wrapped up in food I almost forgot!) they all were amazingly well behaved! We fed James early and put him to bed just before dinner so it was only the older kids and us. They all held up until the end of the cheese course, just before dessert, when Isaac and Ethan started to get restless and a bit antsy after sitting for an hour and a bit for dinner.

When dinner was done I showed them all to the door and waved good-bye while they thanked me for inviting them, then ran around to the side door and said, "Mom, we're home!" and told me all about their evening - so fun!

Part III and IV

2009-09-09T17:39:00.004-04:00

Part III - Pizza stuff

We love homemade pizza at our house! Every Saturday night we make pizza and eat it while watching a movie in the basement. This is special for a few reasons. First, they rarely get to eat in anywhere outside the kitchen/dining room. Second, we watch a movie in the dark on our ridiculously big TV with the cool sound system. Third, during the summer we use ingredients from our garden to make the pizza! Here are some photos from the other night's pizza!

Here's the sauce from scratch (well, we added a bit of leftover spaghetti sauce to it)

The last two zucchini (YEAH! The kids were beginning to mutiny.)

These used to be green beans, but I left them on the vine WAY too long - the seeds over developed. I boiled them like you would kidney beans. AWESOME! I had no idea they had so much flavor!

The dough, of course, came from our bread maker, it's so much better fresh!

I neglected the after shot, but it was delicious!

Part IV: Corn

The corn (actually we had this another night) was so beautiful! I was so anxious to eat it that I plucked it one Sunday evening with a stupidly giddy look on my face.

I served it up with lots of talk about how "I grew it myself" and how "it's probably no good but we'll see," right? Standard self depreciation to remind myself not to get too proud, no real need to be concerned. I took one bite and thought, YUCK! I took another bite from the other end, just to make sure. It was gross. Well, gross texture, the flavor was actually OK. But where was the crisp bursting of little kernals in my mouth? What was up with the chewy nastiness that got stuck to our teeth and formed a second layer of corn-skin enamel on them? No one but the kids finished it. Suck! It was so deceptively yummy looking!

Many Part-ed Postings

2009-08-15T09:40:00.014-04:00

SO. I keep thinking there's nothing much going on. There isn't really, but there have been SOME things going one periodically which I shall spend the rest of the morning updating my friends and family on.

Part I - Camping in Hershey, PA

First up is our drive to Hershey, PA in June. It was a vacation that was supposed to be without Clarence because we sit around not going anywhere all summer while he works. But this year I was determined to get out of town for a while, however, he can't stand to be left out of anything so he finagled his schedule to get two days off in a row and drove the CRV behind our van on Monday and back again on Tuesday. Crazy waste of gas? Maybe, but it was nice to have him there!

Sadly, we didn't actually take many photos, and you may have seen these on my Facebook, but it's all I've got! We met up with our friends, the Holts, whom we lived across the parking lot from in Chapel Hill, NC. Jen, being the graphic designer she is, made matching t-shirts for all the kids so they'd be easier to keep track of at the amusement park (and because they're just so darn cute!). And here they all are, taking up one entire ride all by themselves!

Here's my good friend Jen and her kiddies behind us on the train. James fell asleep so Clarence walked him in the stroller while we rode around the park. It was a nice break!

And some of you may already know how much I loathed the Hershey chocolate factory that is so NOT small kid friendly but we got a cute picture of the kids before we realized it was a bad idea to try to keep track of 7 small kids in the dark during a historical video and left.

Our trip ended by getting rained on (we were tenting) so we went to a hotel the last night while the Holts swam and the Tangs all got sick. Yep, Isaac and I were puking our guts up, which made me ESPECIALLY glad we'd gone to a hotel and not in our tents. It was only a 24 hour thing so the drive home wasn't too bad, and we made it home only 3 hours later than we'd planned!

Part II - The Garden

Next is my garden. I've posted a few things here and there about the seedlings but it's all grown now and over producing and I just can't keep on top of all the zucchini and yellow squash! Here they are in June:

Here they are a couple of weeks ago!

And the tomatoes are turning orange as we speak, by next week I'll have an overabundance of them as well. It's my own fault, I knew I was planting too many but I couldn't stop myself!

One of the plants I'm most excited about is the corn - who grows corn in their backyard?! I do! I'm getting at least one nice sized ear on each stalk! Some have two! This is what it looked like shortly after planting.

And here it is now! All big and tall (one stalk fallen victim to a critter) and almost ready to eat! I can't wait!

And you may remember a former posting of how Clarence butchered my bushes. Well, I've put the space to very good use and it is now my herb garden! Not only that, the flowering quince and rose bush I was so sad to lose have come back with a vengeance! Here is a picture of my herbs!

Do you have any idea how much FUN it is to get herbs directly from your own soil when you need them? I don't buy parsley, basil, sage, green onions, thyme, mint, lemon balm (which is great in water) or fennel because I'm growing them all by my kitchen door. And I don't have them rotting in my fridge because I only need 3 tablespoons but had to buy 5 cups worth. And! When they start to get overgrown I prune them, hang them and now I have very potent dried herbs to last through this winter. Jealous? If not there is something wrong with you! (just kidding!) This is so much fun I'm going to rip out more bushes this fall to make room for more herbs next summer! (and when I say "I'm going to rip out bushes" you know I mean "Clarence is going to rip out bushes")

Parts III and IV are coming soon!

Another Referral

2009-06-30T15:52:00.003-04:00

I'm not very interesting lately, unless you count cleaning the couches as interesting. However, I've come across another post that made me glad my kids are as repelled by poop as I am. Enjoy. http://www.feministmormonhousewives.org/?p=2540 (again, copy and paste because I don't recall any of the HTML I used to know)

Already?!

2009-05-29T16:03:00.005-04:00

I was sitting on the couch a few moments ago when Ethan walks over and flips me the bird. He just stands there, flipping me off. I've been expecting him to learn some naughty things at school and so I quickly run over in my head how to let him know it's rude to stick that finger up at people - without making a big deal about it. Then he says, "Mom, I hurt my fingernail." I laughed. Hard. I gave it a kiss and then a big hug and told him how funny he is. He gave me a look that said, "I always knew you were nuts" then went back to the piano to finish practicing. I love kids.

A little somethin to make you smile

2009-04-26T20:36:00.008-04:00

An oral retelling of the Star Wars plot by someone who's never seen the movie. I'm going to go watch it again.

http://vimeo.com/2809991 (sorry, I can't get the link thing to work so you'll have to copy and paste)

Only a few minutes long - take a break!

Can't catch a break!

2009-04-19T20:34:00.006-04:00

I am a pruning fool lately! There is a 50' stretch of random, oversized shrubs lining my driveway and I want to be rid of the poke-y ones (barberry, for those of you who know what that is) because they're just ugly after the way my well-meaning neighbor has been shearing them for 10 years.

I got the one just right of the yellow forsythia out Saturday morning before needing a nap (we went dancing Friday night and I was TIRED - I'll blog about that when I get the picture off Hubby's phone) and Clare was being the wonderful husband his is by continuing to work while I napped...for 3 1/2 hours.

When I woke up at 4pm he was making dinner (I know, my husband is better than your husband) and he excitedly told me to go view his hard labor. So I open the door that opens to the driveway and this is what met my eyes (though it was still daytime).

All my flowering shrubs were gone. The Forsythia, the pink flowery one (the spiking branches just beyond the one I took out) and even the rose bush (that, admittedly, I ignorantly butchered last spring. It was recovering!) was nothing but a few nubs screaming from the soil. I quickly walked out and shut the door, not wanting Clarence to witness my reaction to his "help" until I could accept it and move on. I was much more upset last summer when my neighbor topped my pink flowery one after I'd asked him to leave it alone but this was still hard to swallow.

On top of that, Clarence has declared that I should not attempt to take out the rest of them because it's just too much work. Well, maybe it'll be too much work for HIM, but all I have to do is cut the branches, he's the one who digs out the roots and I don't see a problem with that. However, he's given me enough room for some kitchen herbs so I'll wait until we get sun again at the end of the week before approaching the subject again.

In the meantime, I made gigantic cookies, just because losing weight was beginning to get a little too easy.

We are a biker family

2009-04-10T17:46:00.004-04:00

Or maybe a cycling family, I'm never really sure which term is more common, though I think cycling is definitely more accurate. So here we are on our first family bike ride of the season and I started off trying to take pictures behind my back, but it didn't turn out so well...

The boys decide they need rest after about 3 full blocks (but I made them wait a few blocks more before getting water.). I think we'll need to build up their strength before the mile trek to the library.

Their favorite parts are the middle bit of the route because it's mostly downhill. They scream with embarrassing amounts of enjoyment all the way down and then have to stop to catch their breath again at the bottom. Our rides don't cover a lot of ground but they sure take a long time!

Lillian and James enjoyed it about as much as they ever do, though this year, instead of wrestling James into his helmet he wants to wear it all the time! Yay!

And, though I could easily have pulled the trailer myself (thanks to my uber cool workout schedule!) I felt Clarence would enjoy the workout, and I let him do it.

After our sadly short ride, the last 2 blocks of which Isaac walked up the "hill", I cleaned up our driveway a bit while the kids and Sammy played in the yard. Ethan being the photofilic boy he is, asked me to take this photo of him on the top of the ladder we bought so we could change the lightbulb in the stairwell (it extends and also locks flat to extend further.

And on a completely different topic, I recovered my dining room chairs last fall (or maybe summer, I really don't recall) and the kids promptly picked all the protective plastic off. Now I have to do it again with a thicker plastic or risk the fabric being ruined by their messiness (yes, we have plastic covered dining room chairs - it's the only way to keep them nice!). I'd intended to do a "before and after" sequence but honestly, the "after" looks just like this only with smooth plastic.

To close I'd like to share with you my most favorite new thing. My glow in the dark retainer. It's so strong it actually casts light! (for about 10 seconds)

Cool, eh?!

We got a puppy

2009-04-08T20:56:00.003-04:00

...for a week. We're puppy-sitting for our friends, the Curtis', golden retriever puppy who is only, uh, a couple months old. His name is Sammy and we are very excited for this little preview into what having a dog will be like.

Here is scratching,

lazily chewing a bone,

pulling on my hoodie string,

trying to warm up under my bum

and pooing, of course.

You may wonder why I've taken so many photos of a dog that doesn't belong to me. Well, my friend Ann Marie, whose puppy this is, brought Sammy over last night and cried before leaving. Then she called first thing this morning (though I couldn't get to the phone because we were getting ready for school), and then again before noon. I'm thinking the photos will help her cope. Don't worry Ann Marie, Sammy is well loved and cared for at the Tang house. There is definitely no lack of attention. He can clear the back yard of people with the smell of his poop, which he did about a million times, and I got all but two of them picked up before he ate them! Yeah for the poo picker.

Crafty

2009-03-20T13:22:00.007-04:00

I've been feeling spring in the air (it's been consistently above 40 degrees) and have gotten some kind of bug! I can't stop creating! So this first picture is actually a bit of a remake from NC. I cut the heads off fake flowers and stuck them into green florist foam (the really messy stuff). I like it enough to keep it but it doesn't really hit the spot, if you know what I mean. Still, it's fun!

This is our first hyacinth! Upside-down! I don't know how to flip it without involving photoshop, sorry!

And can I just say how much I love planting? I've planted so many seeds I've run out of space, and in two weeks I'll be planting more... I may have to buy hanging pots for the front window. But we are going to have one AWESOME garden this year!

I've been working on this quiet book for a few months now. I did a few online searches and gathered some ideas to build my own book (there weren't any that captured my interest enough to purchase it, so I'm making one that does!). This book will have a page for every color of the rainbow plus brown, black, pink, white and gray. Red and Orange are finished so I included pictures, I'm mostly done with Yellow but I'll wait until I'm totally done to take pictures. I'm not really good with a sewing machine but I think I'm getting better, or at least learning to make them look a little tidier.

They're mostly snaps, buttons and clasps right now but I'm going to put in other fun stuff in later pages! You should see the amount of stuff I bought at JoAnn's (especially ribbon - don't ask me why I love ribbons!)

Oh, and I lost 6lbs - can you tell?

Sorry, it's all I've got in me tonight...

2009-03-18T21:32:00.003-04:00

Apple juice or orange juice? Milk

Are you a morning or night person? Morning, being a Mom has forced me into daylife.

Which do you prefer, sweet or salty foods? If I'm cutting calories? Both

Ninjas or pirates? Ninjas.

Ninjas vs pirates, discuss. Pirates have swords and eye patches. Ninjas have throwing stars and skills. Ninjas are obviously superior.

Autobots or Decepticons? Hmm, I'm not really "into" Transformers.

What was your favorite childhood television program? Smurfs and She-Ra

Are you a collector of anything? hobbies

If you could be any animal, what would you be? A cat 'cause they're sneaky.

If you could have any superpower, what would it be? Fly!

What is usually your first thought when you wake up? Isaac, go back to bed.

What do you usually think about right before falling asleep? I should have come to bed an hour ago.

What's your favorite color? A rusty, burnt orange.

What's your favorite animal? Doggies!

Do you believe in extraterrestrials or life on other planets? Sure. It's a big place.

Do you believe in ghosts? Uh, sure.

Ever been addicted to a video/computer game? Which one(s)? I get addicted to anything that comes along when I am escaping.

You're given 1 million dollars, what do you spend it on? Travelling. And new boobs. (not really, but I'd think about it)

Have any bad habits? I leave my clothes on the floor

Which bad habits, if any, drive you crazy? Chewing with your mouth open. Sorry, I don't care how nice you are, if you can't keep your trap shut when you're masticating food and spit then I've lost respect for you. (I know, I feel too strongly about this)

List 3 of your best personality traits: enthusiastic, spontaneous, crafty (interpret as you please)

List 3 of your worst personality traits: I can get really pissy, I like to procrastinate unpleasant tasks in the hope that someone will take care of them for me, thoughtlessly thoughtless, if that makes any sense.

Have any celebrity crushes? Nope, I'm not really one to pine for the unreachable

List 1 thing you wish you could change about yourself: personality? the procrastinating thing. Physically? Sallow
complexion.

Any tattoos or piercings? only my ears

What's the first thing you notice in the opposite sex? I never know what to say to this type of question - don't you notice different things on different people?

What personality traits do you look for in a partner? principled

What personality traits do you dislike in other people? arrogance

Are you mostly a clean or messy person? Alone - clean. With kids - messy (I'm easily swayed by the crowd)

Do you see yourself getting married in the next 5 years? I really hope that's not necessary.

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live? Duh, Ireland. It's only the prettiest place on earth.

If you could visit anywhere in the world, where would you go? Everywhere.

List 5 goals on your life's to-do list: Learn Mandarin, visit China for an extended period of time, lose my baby-weight, dance on a regular basis, live near family, climb Matchupichu, backpack Europe, visit the Middle East... (the list goes)

Name 1 regret you have: you don't want to know

Name 1 thing you miss about being a kid: Free time

Name 1 thing you love about being an adult: Driving

What's your favorite song of the moment? Too many to name

What's your favorite song of all time? Accidentally Kelly Street

What's your favorite thing to do on a Saturday night? Go dancing, not that I've gotten to do that in the past 10 years.

What's your favorite thing to do on a Sunday afternoon? sleep

Have any hidden talents? Nope, I broadcast all of my talents.

You're about to walk the green mile, what do you have as your last meal? Crawfish

What would be your dream job? Event coordinator or landscape architect, at the moment

Which would you rather have, 100 million dollars or true love? Give me the money (I've already got the love!)

If you could have 3 wishes granted, what would they be? This is beginning to feel redundant. (see the bucket-list question)

Ever wish you were born the opposite sex? If so, why? All my childhood was spent wishing I was a boy so that I didn't have to wear a dress to church.

Name 1 thing not many people know about you: I love to stretch. When I go to the gym I cut my cardio short so that I have more time to stretch.

If you HAD to change your name, what would you change it to? Cordelia, because that's what Anne would do

Do you believe in the afterlife? Yep

On the topic of abortion, how do you feel about cookies? Despise abortions, love cookies - especially Girl Scout Cookies.

I Could Have Laaaughed All Night!

2009-03-05T14:05:00.004-05:00

LEARN CHINESE IN 5 MINUTES
(You MUST read them out loud or it doesnt make as much sense)...
1) Thats not right...... Sum Ting Wong
2) Are you harboring a fugitive....... Hu Yu Hai Ding
3) See me ASAP...... Kum Hia Nao
4) Small horse...... Tai Ni Po Ni
5) Did you go to the beach?...... Wai Yu So Tan
6) I bumped in to a coffee table...... Ai Bang Mai Ni
7) I think you need a face lift...... Chin Tu Fat
8) It's very dark in here...... Wao So Dim
9) I thought you were on a diet...... Wai Yu Mun Ching
10) This is a tow away zone...... No Pah King
11) Staying out of sight...... Lei Yin Lo
12) He's cleaning his automobile...... Wa Shing Ka
13) Your body odor is offensive...... Yu Stin Ki Pu
14) Underwear.......Tai Ti Wai Ti

Banging My Head Against the Wall!

2009-03-03T21:03:00.005-05:00

As the title indicates, I wanted to bang my head against the wall but of course it's hurts too much for me to put any real force behind it and would only add feeling like a wuss to wanting to hurt something aggressively so I'm not going to bother. However, I auto-piloted to the computer and, since I had already checked all my regular sites, typed "bang my head against the wall" into Google. It brought up some interesting sights and I amused myself for a good 20 minutes reading about other people's frustrations. It made me feel better because I don't have their frustrations and I figure mine will pass (I'm not telling what mine are, so you'll just have to wonder - please be creative with your idle curiosity, but remember to make it flattering) quicker than theirs. Like an economist irritated with John Cochrane and the state of our economy today - that's not going away anytime soon. And a mom who is obviously letting her daughter control her and thinks the best way for her to grow out of it is to allow it to continue. Then there was an epileptic woman who's "left nostril" doctor didn't want to deal with her "right nostril" seizures - or something like that.

And now I can be grateful for:

1) Not being a professor of economics at Berkley during our current economic state (whether you believe there is a recession or not),
2) Not being as big an idiot as that other mom,
3) Not being epileptic.

Still, my drama continues.

Happiness is a High Metabolism. Sadness is a Rhythmically Challenged Step Intructor

2009-01-30T13:10:00.006-05:00

Happiness is a high metabolism:

If you have a high metabolism you can eat lemon pound cake and M&M cookies every day and not worry about outgrowing your new jeans. I don't have a high metabolism and so I've outgrown my jeans, but I still wear them. I look like a sausage about to burst open - so I only wear them with long shirts or my black pea coat that covers my tush - but the important thing is that I am able to get into them.

Sadness is a Rhythmically Challenged Step Aerobics Instructor:

I'm in the beginning of a new commitment to working out. I go to the YMCA on M/W/F at 6:30am and get home by 7:45am so that Clarence can get to school. I would go on T/Th as well but my first class starts at 8am and I can't get up early enough to workout and shower before school (and I figure I shouldn't over do the exercising, like maybe it would be bad for me - wouldn't want to become one of those emaciated women working frantically at the elliptical who look like what they really need is psycho analysis. It's a fine line). This time I'm doing it right, though. Generally I jump into a workout at the level I was at at age 17 and then I get shin splints and my knee starts to hurt. This time I joined a class and was determined to act my age (30 is, after all, old).

I go to the class a little late, because it hurts me to get up at 6am, and I go to the back of the class, set up my step and take a look around me to size up the instructor. I'll let you in on a secret here, I'm a little critical of my instructors. I'm not an expert, but I've been dancing most of my life and whether it's kick boxing or turbo step or cardio boot camp (which aren't that different from dancing) there are some things that remain the same: 1) You use your music to energize and unify your class 2) Keep the choreography relatively simple and straightforward and 3) Only go as fast as your average student can go. The woman at the front of the room was moving like a bat out of H E double hockey sticks and didn't seem to notice there was music on at all. She got some points for having simple choreography but she did it way too fast. And she uses good music too, not that generic stuff that sounds like elevator music for workouts. She counts us in, in time with the music, and then is off like a bullet through the rest of the section without pausing to notice her music again. 35 minutes into the class she looked up at the clock, stopped a second looking stunned and told us all to get a pilates ring for more upper body work. I assumed this meant she didn't realize she was going so fast, like maybe this is her first class and she's just getting used to it. But the next class was just the same and I wanted to scream through most of it. Maybe it's my addiction to music. When there is music playing I automatically match my movements to it. I cannot walk around the grocery store out of time with music playing over the tinny-sounding speakers. I dance on the treadmill, I dance while making dinner and my kids and I dance around the living room before Clarence makes us settle down for bedtime. It is impossible for me to ignore a beat and so you can imagine how much fun it is to try following the speed demon for an hour. I have to leave 2 or 3 times each class to get a hold on my irritation - I find mysef thinking, "SHE'S CRAZY! I HATE HER STUPID WORKOUT!" and that's when I know it's time to take a break.

But this week I came up with another way to deal with it. Instead of being irritated I've just started going my own speed. I'm still doing the same thing as the teacher but I'm following the music and am out of sync with the rest of the class, most people are only doing half of the movements anyway so I figure I won't stand out too much. Wrong. She notices me. She's watching me throughout the whole class and even works her way to the back of the room a few times. I just keep plodding along in time with the music and I wonder if she thinks I'm trying to disrupt her class. I hoped she just thought that I'm not strong enough (which is true - I tried going her speed but kept hurting my ankle and my knee hurt the rest of the day) but I think it still pisses her off. This is the end of the third week of classes and I can feel myself getting a lot stronger, and already my bum is tighter (though you can't see it yet, I can just feel it :) and am definitely a little roomier in my sausage casings, but I still weigh the same (someone once told me this is because I'm losing chub and gaining muscle, which is heavier, at first. I like this theory so please don't disillusion me if you've heard contrary). I'd post a photo or something, like maybe of me working out, but I don't wear makeup and it's very early and, quite frankly, my self-esteem is just not up to posting something like that. So you can imagine me in smokin' workout pants and a cute top with new gym shoes and I won't ruin the image with an actual picture. L8er!

Look What I Did This Weekend!

2008-12-15T23:39:00.005-05:00

Saturday morning I decided I wanted to make each of the kids a quilt for Christmas (they all argue over specific blankets because they fit perfectly and are easy to make the bed with). I went to JoAnn's and bought a lot of fabric, came home and got to work as soon as the kids were in bed. This blanket is for Ethan, the others will look exactly like this one, only with different patterns. It's not professional or anything, but still... I'm so proud of myself! I've never made a quilt before! Aren't you impressed?!

Big Turk!!

2008-12-12T00:44:00.002-05:00

Clarence went to Canada today and brought me back some Big Turks, Ketchup chips and Dill Pickle chips for our Christmas Day Pic! Can't wait to eat them!

The Good and The Bad

2008-12-06T23:34:00.005-05:00

Date Night = Good
Late Babysitter = Bad
Dressing nice = Good
Wearing a shirt two nights in a row because you have nothing else festive = Bad
Handel's Messiah = Good
Short skirt in -7.5C on a long walk to the car = Bad
Husband takes babysitter home = Good
Husband takes babysitter home because Wife's little piggies are frozen = Bad
Apple Crisp = Good
Apple skins left on apples in the Apple Crisp = Bad
Exercise to work off apple crisp = Good
Waking up the kids because you're exercising at midnight = Bad
Blogging = Good
Procrastinating bedtime = Bad

What was I talking about?

2008-11-19T09:36:00.008-05:00

I will never again read Clarence's blog before getting on to post something new. I was all excited about my new house plant and now I'm sad again. I miss my mother-in-law, she was great and I'm sad for all the years I will miss out on her advice and funny behaviors. I feel her absence already.

On that happy note, I will try to muster up some interest in the topic at hand. As much as I love plants I'm not great at keeping them alive - as witnessed by one of the plants I left behind when we went to Winnipeg last week.

This was my favorite plant, large broad leaves that made it look twice it's current size. Very lush. It's been watered now for 2 days and the leaves are still crispy. I guess we should have watered it a little more before leaving, eh Nancy?

However! A friend is moving next summer and already starting to unload her stuff as much as possible. This is great for me because I got three plants, including one house plant that she said she "didn't get along with" and could never get to flower after she bought it (it's a goldfish plant). I figured it may as well die off in my house as hers so I brought it home and clipped all the scraggly, dead branches and read up on how to care for it. This was a month ago and today I noticed a flower!

It's actually thriving! This is very encouraging, especially after the resent demise of my beloved broad-leafy. If I can keep this up I may actually get another one!

Photos, photos everywhere!

2008-10-09T22:21:00.009-04:00

I apologize to anyone on Facebook who has to see these twice (because I've posted them there, too.) Even though my face didn't fit perfectly into the holes provided on most of these, it was still really fun! They are in order: '68 '70 '78 '74 '80 '52 '58 '62 '64 '66. The website is obviously on all the photos. www.yearbookyourself.com. Have fun!

2008-09-14T21:00:00.002-04:00

You know, creme brulee is an AWESOME dessert. But it's not so great if you forget to put sugar in it.

New Student

2008-09-01T20:31:00.003-04:00

I'm going to school tomorrow. It's only 7 credits and what with Ethan, Isaac, Lillian and James all starting either school or preschool tomorrow, too, I haven't had much time to worry about my own reentry into college, even if it is only at a community college, though it's sort of been in my mind all day. But this evening while I drove to the grocery store I kept missing turns and slamming the breaks and almost running lights (we only live a mile away from the grocery store!) and then I was tripping all over and running into door frames. When it suddenly dawned on me that I was nervous about going back to school I stopped right in the middle of the cheese section. How pathetic. But it HAS been about 6 years and I'm not even in my twenties anymore! (my 30th birthday was 2 weeks ago) I noticed people looking at me so I started walking again, but this time I had to force myself to concentrate on my task. As it was I'd already bought sushi and candied ginger for no apparent reason so I went home, only to find I'd forgotten James' milk. He'll have to drink skim tonight because it's too dangerous for me to drive right now. On the drive home I wondered if I'd have enough time after dropping the kids off to bring back the mini-van and take the little car instead. And I have a couple of zits on my chin - aren't I too old for zits anymore? Don't they ever stop? I've been planning to jog on the treadmill tonight but I'm worried now that I'll hurt myself and end up with another skid mark up my cheekbone. I'm going to bed because I'm working myself into a frenzy.

I'm luckier than you.

2008-08-28T22:03:00.002-04:00

Many of you may know that I have been bugging Clarence for 8 years to take a ballroom dancing class with me but maybe you don't know the reason. Ladies, take note: Laughing at the dancing of someone who is already uncomfortable dancing will leave you to find a new partner, and if you're already married to that someone you're just SOL. However, Clarence being the magnanimous man he is, has finally forgiven me and agreed to dance again. We started last week and tonight was our second night! It's great fun and since we're both detail oriented (well, I'm detail oriented when I'm learning something new...) we're getting along at a good pace. Yeah for us!

That's not the reason for my blog tonight, though. Tonight the stupidity didn't begin until after the class (our teacher LOVES us! :). On my way back from taking our babysitter home I pulled up to a turn and saw an older guy who looked like he'd fallen and hurt his ankle. He was trying to get up but kept falling back over and I felt really bad for him so I pulled up next to him and asked if he needed help. He said he only lived a block away but he really looked like he needed help so I asked if I could drive him there and he said, "Well, yeah, thanks." He was really embarrassed so I came around to help him in the car. I braced myself to really pull hard but he was super light, I barely felt his weight at all. As I was getting him around the door I asked if he'd hurt his ankle or something and he said, "No, I'm just drunk." I then reassessed the situation and felt like an idiot. He seemed so soft spoken and kind and he REALLY needed help getting home so I decided to continue on with my good deed. Who knows how he got out there and I didn't want to ask in case his wife was leaving him for another man and he started to cry or something. So I just went around to the driver's side and started talking about how I was just dropping off my babysitter and my husband and I had gone to a dance class tonight and I live really close. I considered making up a reason why I would be missed immediately but didn't want to make him feel bad for being a drunk guy, obviously he felt bad enough. He kept saying how nice I was and how uncommon it was for me to do that and I just said, "Don't worry about it, hopefully you won't remember it tomorrow anyway." He thanked me for the sentiment but said he was certain he would. I pulled up to his house (he was actually 5 blocks away and across a few intersections, he would have been roadkill) and watched as he got up to the door but didn't want to watch him open the door in case there was some domestic weirdness going on and I drove off. He was nice and even though I felt really stupid for having picked a drunk guy up off the street he happened to be harmless and in actual need of help so I'm glad I did. Clarence just shook his head at me and said I was going to get killed one day. Maybe.

Jell-O

2008-07-26T23:48:00.002-04:00

I'm not sure where the thread of conversation began, but a few days ago Lillian, Isaac, Yeh Yeh and I were chatting at a table. Lillian announced, "I am Jell-O," to which I said, "Yep. You're soft and squishy." Then Isaac turns to me sharply and says, "You're Jell-O, Mom," as he reached over and squished my arm.

Fainting Spell. No really - I fainted.

2008-07-06T13:04:00.002-04:00

You'll never guess what happened to me last night! I was standing in my kitchen, chatting with a friend and I started getting dizzy so I bent over to let the blood get back to my head and I distantly hear her asking if she should call an ambulance. Then I become aware that I'm lying on the floor and my face hurts and my friend is rubbing my back saying, "Annie? Annie?" What happened? No clue. I roll over and she tells me that I fell face first into the floor and lay there, twitching. It sounded ridiculous but I believed her because my right cheek and upper lip were killing me. I tried to sit up but my neck hurt so bad that I just laid there, laughing about my faint heart. We sat there laughing histerically for about 20 minutes before I finally convinced her that I was fine and she should go home to bed. This morning I slept straight through 8am and was still a little sick when I tried to get ready for church. I had to go really slowly and we were an hour late for church. I look like I was in a bike accident and my neck is screaming for a chiropractor. (I've been looking for my camera so I could take a picture for you all but I can't seem to find it. I'd promise you one but I'll probably forget by the time the camera resurfaces.) I guess I should have eaten more yesterday. And gone to bed before 1am at least once during the week. Those are my only guesses for an explanation. Maybe shopping for five hours last night didn't help either. But I found a cute outfit to wear to Clarence's graduation so I can't say I'm displeased, even if, when combined with my poor health, it caused my face plant. Ugh. How stupid. I really wish I could say I chased down a mugger or beat off an attacker. Having facial scars because you stayed up too late is lame. I'll come up with a better story. So that's my drama for this week. Sucks that it's written all over my face but the scrapes aren't deep enough to bleed so I'm hoping they won't scar.

Stolen Idea

2008-07-01T00:27:00.003-04:00

So I'm wasting a little time here to play a game my dear friend Lindsay Baldry, from the great metropolis of Raymond, Alberta, played on her blog a while ago. You type in "Annie is" into google and see what comes up. Here goes:

Annie is a musical based upon the popular Harold Gray comic strip Little Orphan Annie, with music by Charles Strouse, lyrics by martin Charnin and the book by Thomas Meehan. (no kidding, this is the very first result...typical)

Annie has her pride. (Hunh! Do not!)

Annie is feeling a little crazy. (Annie is always a little crazy)

An evening with Mountain Annie's is a must do... (yes, must do an evening with mountain Annie, wouldn't skip it if you paid me)

Ask Annie: Is a liberal Arts degree a waste? (I like this one, makes me feel powerful. I could say "Yes, your wasting your time doing that thing that you love" or I could say, "No, there's a job out there for everyone, stick to what you love," an they'd have to do it whether they wanted to or not because I say so.)

Annie is a great singer and writer. (they *may* have been talking about Annie Lennox, but maybe they were talking about me. It could happen.)

Annie's is upstairs from the Kitty Cat Klub. (?!)

I'm going to stop there before we get too risque. And besides, it's the kids' nap time. I must take advantage.

Miss Positive Energy

2008-06-30T15:59:00.007-04:00

I'm looking back over my recent posts and seeing a surprising amount of negativity. This post is going to balance things out with a list of the things that make me happy so you get to see my attractive, friendly side rather than my ugly, foaming-at-the-mouth side.

I have a clean, orderly garage! Yeah!

I get to go see Clarence graduate in Rhode Island! Vacation!

My friend's husband took care of James during Sunday school so I could listen! Spirituality!

I'm going to see "Get Smart" tomorrow sans kids! Freedom!

My clothes are starting to fit again! Smaller booty!!

I have leftovers in the fridge and I don't have to cook dinner tonight! Laziness!

Lilly and James nap at the same time every day. Quiet time!

I'm driving a ZX-2 instead of a mini-van! Cool!

I can go shopping any time I want and Clarence can do nothing to stop me! Mwa ha ha!

The weather has cooled! Sweatless!

I have truffles on my dresser! Chocolate!

Clarence has sent me flowers two weeks in a row! Sweetness!

I don't have to put my blow dryer, curling iron, straightening iron, hair clips or brushes away because Clarence isn't around to complain! Double laziness!

Okay. As I think of more I'll add them to the list. I'm feeling happier already!

What's the Deal?!

2008-06-30T09:04:00.003-04:00

My neighbor is a nice retired guy who has been trimming the hedges between our properties. This is particularly nice because our yard is about 2-3 feet higher than his and the bushes are clearly on our side. Now, I've been planning to rip out that ugly, overgrown hedge but I discovered that three of them have really pretty flowers in the spring, so I changed the plan to only ripping out the barberry bushes and reshaping the flowering bushes. I got to work isolating and pruning (rather than using shears) to reshape them into pretty, round flowering assets to my landscape. Fortunately my neighbor had come over to shear them one day while I was out there and I explained to him what I was doing and he kindly went around them. That happened about a month ago, and this morning I'm pulling up the shades and they've all been given a flat top - now they look really stupid. He must have done some work last night while we were having dinner at a friends house. I have no idea WHY he cut them this time because there's no way he went about business as usual and just forgot not to cut them - the back part of the row is cut into individual bushes. This puts me back and ENTIRE growing season - it takes a while to retrain a bush and have it look nice! And I can't talk to him because he's living at a friends apartment to help her while she recovers from surgery. And I feel bad being mad at him because he's such a nice guy! I'm pissy.

Sucky Landscapers

2008-06-18T14:05:00.003-04:00

I've been so anxious for my backyard to be graded and sodded that I can actually picture what my yard will look like when it's finished - I can't wait! So I called a few companies, got a few estimates. I had all 30 trees in our back yard cut out last fall and used (we'll call them SUCK Co.)'s low bid to bring down the bid of the company that I'd wanted to go with (they just seemed to know more about what they were doing). I was going to do this again but felt bad and decided to give SUCK CO the job since she was giving me the best bids. I'd had a professor in college warn us about the low-bidders. They do a worse job but they're still in business because they give the best price. I'd vaguely remembered this the first time she came (and it was part of the reason I preferred the other company) but I forgot about it when they came again. SUCK!

She called me on a Friday to say she'd be here the following Wednesday and when the day came I waited around till noon. Finally I called to find out what was going on and she said that because of the rain they were two days behind and they'd be here Friday. I didn't even point out that she hadn't called to let me know what was going on. So Friday comes and they don't show up again. Clarence emails to ask if they're coming because we hadn't heard from them in a while. She emails back and said she was waiting on a 50% deposit, though she had never mentioned it before. He emails back, said he'd happily give her whatever she requires as long as she tells us about it first! Today is Wednesday and again I wait until noon, I even pushed it till 2pm and they never showed up. I am LIVID. I call the company that I'd wanted to hire to begin with, ask them to come and begin calling the SUCK Co. No one answers. I hang up, go to the front yard and there they are, coming up the drive. Perfect.

So she comes up to me and I asked, "Where were ya'll?" (my accent comes back when I'm pissed)

She says, "We had another job and we didn't finish."

"You were supposed to call me last week," I said rather politely.

She said something about talking to my husband online (which I assume meant "email") about coming today.

I said, "And this morning?" Still I was very calm and tried not to look angry.

She said again that they were at another job and didn't finish. I figured this was a stupid conversation and I didn't want to stand there complaining so I told her, "I've called another company. Thanks for coming."

And she said, "Oh." Then she turns to a GIGANTIC guy with bulging muscles and tattoos and a "Burns Landscaping" T-shirt with ripped off sleeves. I walked back inside. I needed to get away before I unleashed my fury and frustration on her because I'd only to regret it later. I am almost certain she has no idea why I'm so mad that I would call another company. She didn't seem to think it was a big deal that we always had to seek her out. I'm really angry that this is the outcome of all my expectations! I was really looking forward to having my yard done and who knows how long it'll be before I can get the other guy out here - I'd had to wait a month for SUCK Co. And now it's getting hotter, the sod with be more work to care for and I have to look at that lot of WEEDS until the weather starts to cool down again. But I can't trust that she'll do a good job on my yard and I guess I'd rather wait till next spring than have SUCK Co. destroy it. I want to cry. Stupid girl. Stupid company. Stupid, scary bulging muscles guy. I hate them all. Not really, but I wish I could.

Navy

2008-06-08T23:57:00.008-04:00

Today's the day that will change our lives forever. One minute we're the masters of our own destiny. The next minute we are slaves to The Man. (not the man we're related to) I'm not scared, not really, but I am still surprised that after avoiding militarily inclined men my whole life I ended up with a Canadian who wants to join the American military. And stranger still is that he has almost convinced me that this really is the best path for our lives to take. (I say almost because there is a part of me that is mourning the loss of all the freedom private practice would have brought, like a vintage Porsche. I'm going to have to wait a lot longer for my Porsche. Although I saw a 1954 Corvette today that I really like...)

Despite my trivial reservations, the whole day felt good. I woke up feeling like something significant was about to happen - something good - and I can timidly announce that I am 100% on board with this decision after feeling so good about it all day - and I hope this statement doesn't come back to bite me.

Psycho Mom

2008-06-04T07:30:00.004-04:00

We've been riding our bikes a lot lately, the boys and I. I put James and Lillian in the trailer and we bike all over Ann Arbor. The other night we were coming home from the park and, because there are no crosswalks on our street, when there were no cars visible from either direction we crossed. Except Isaac was being slow and when I got across I turned to see him slowly creeping from the sidewalk to the street. I checked up the street, still no cars visible. I looked down the street and there is a big black SUV barreling up towards us. I yell to Isaac to hurry it up but he actually begins to slow down - not stop and turn around, but actually slow almost to a crawl. I tried to pull the trailer up onto the sidewalk so I could go get him or something but this SUV is going so fast and doesn't even seem to see Isaac. Of course Isaac is scared stiff and almost stopped before the stupid car finally swerves 10 ft away from him! I went ballistic. If I hadn't had to think about James and Lillian on the back of my bike I would have jumped off, pulled the driver out and beat the holy tar out of whoever it was. Clarence laughed at this when I told him, but quite frankly, I know how to incapacitate a man and I had more than enough adrenalin to do it. I was yelling, swearing and trying to calm myself down so I could comfort Isaac but it was almost a useless effort. He was crying and shaking when the man came out, fortunately calmer than me and I asked him what the **** he was doing, since he obviously wasn't watching the road. He said the sun was in his eyes (the sun was just at the top of the hill). Then I asked him why he was going so **** fast. He didn't have an answer for me. Then his wife comes out with a huge friendly smile on her face and I realize she's coming from the driver's side, so it was actually a stupid woman driver (most people know I think women and old people are the worst drivers in the world, yes, I know I'm a woman) and asks if she can drive us somewhere. I wanted to say, "Yeah, five people, three bikes and a trailer in your oh-so-big SUV." Her happy face was pissing me off again, but I was trying to calm down and apologized to the man for yelling at him. I didn't look at his stupid wife because she was such an idiot. I told them we were almost home and to go ahead. She kept saying, "Are you sure? Are you sure you don't want a ride?" with what she obviously thought was a sympathetic, concerned look on her face and even though I was much calmer by now I wanted to hit her. Fortunately Isaac really was okay, which is the most important part of the ordeal and when they finally left we rode the 2 minutes back to the house, took super-speed baths and went to bed. Another good thing is that I saw the faded lines of a crosswalk nearer to my house (we live on a semi-busy street) if I ever need to cross again, not that it will help if no one is paying attention.

Dentists can do EVERYTHING!

2008-05-08T10:55:00.004-04:00

I received this email from my friend Jen in North Carolina about her kids and I just can't keep it to myself:

Hahaha. What a way to start out my morning. Just overheard this conversation from my kids...

Look! We built a dam!

Yes!! A Dam!

Oh no! It's broke!

Oh no! Oh no!

Now we need a dam doctor!!!

Yes, yes! Where's the dam doctor?!

Go get him! Go get him! Get the dam doctor!

Wait... here's a dentist... he can fix the dam owie.

Good job dentist. Fix the dam owie.

They're still going... hahaha... and here I thought it was going to be a lame hard day.

mwah

Jenny

Where exactly did I go wrong?

2008-05-04T20:58:00.003-04:00

So. I'm sitting at my desk in the basement making a copy of a cute book I saw at church today and I hear a sprinkling sound. I think, "A leak" and I look over towards the pipes under the bathroom. Then I catch sight of Isaac standing in the middle of the room TAKING a leak on the FLOOR! I push my chair back from the desk and his head jerks up as he realizes he's been doing something he shouldn't - and he was caught in the act. (Obviously he'd forgotten I was down there) I was speechless. I didn't know what to say to him and I told him so.

"I don't even know what to say to you."

"But I had to go pee pee."

"There is a bathroom not 10 feet from where you're standing."

He stood there staring expectantly and I still couldn't think of anything so I called for Clarence.

"Clarence, I don't really know what to say to Isaac, can you come address this for me?"

He came down and Isaac said, "I'm tired."

So Clarence said, "If you're too tired to make it to the potty then you need a nap." Then he took him to bed for a nap.

I still don't know what to say about this. The floor? Inside the house? Literally 2 yards from the toilet? My only real thought was, "I'm glad we haven't carpeted yet. Thank Heavens he at least aimed away from the rugs!" Still I'm flabbergasted. Who pees in the house? What is the motivation behind peeing on the floor where he is playing with his toys? I'm hoping the event was sufficiently marked on his mind to be able one day to explain what he was thinking. That's all I can hope for by way of satisfaction.

Lillian in Love

2008-05-01T09:54:00.003-04:00

Tuesday during dinner we had a young man knock on the door asking for donations for Michigan Environment (an environmental group) and while I was getting him $10 Lillian asked me what his name was. He told her it was Adrian (or something like that) and gave her a wide smile. When he left she said to me, "Mom, I love him." I about choked but managed to smile and say, "He is a very nice boy, isn't he." And she just kept repeating, "I love him, Mom. I love him."

And riding bikes, too!

2008-04-14T16:05:00.003-04:00

Last summer our dear friend Jen Holt gave us an old bike they didn't use anymore and the boys ride it whenever they get a chance. But today I took off the training wheels to see how they'd do. Isaac went first and balanced really well with only minor falls. Ethan went next and did just as well as Isaac but seemed to enjoy it more. I have video but no photos (I can only do so much by myself!) so I'll post it later when I can get it all downloaded and edited for your enjoyment.

My kids are so much smarter and sportier than your kids.

My Baby's All Growed Up!

2008-04-13T14:10:00.003-04:00

Ethan's tooth has been really loose for a few weeks and today during church he almost laid it on it's side! So I asked if I could wiggle it and just pulled it out. It didn't even bleed (welll, there was a dab, but it was gone in a second) and now he has lost his very first tooth! I wondered what the mother behind me was thinking as she watched me pull it out there in the pew during Testimony Meeting. I took a picture when we got home but we're back onto super slow regular cameras so it'll be a few weeks before it gets back.

Sunburned Plants and Foam Shoes

2008-04-11T18:30:00.004-04:00

I planted hoards of seeds this winter - like 2 months ago - in preparation for Spring. Anxious for nice weather and giddy anytime the temperature goes above 45F, I put the plants outside to begin the "hardening off" process, which is just putting the plants outside during the day so they get used to the stronger light and are less traumatized when you finally plant them in the ground...except I forgot that you need to start them off in the shade for only a few hours a day. When I brought them in that night I had bleached, crispy seedlings. Most have recovered by putting on new leaves, but I lost half of my tomatoes and every eggplant, cucumber and cantaloupe seedling. How embarrassing.

On a more victorious note, I bought my kids imitation Crocs yesterday and when they got muddy this morning they were delighted when I asked them to rinse them off in the hose (they love playing with the hose!).

Anyway. That's my exciting news for the week.

I should be sleeping

2008-04-03T23:19:00.004-04:00

I've been waiting for Clarence to come home from that stupid hospital for a few hours now. After checking and rechecking all of my various accounts and deciding that it is too late to get up and do something productive, I started searching interesting quotes online and found this one:

"What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from."
T.S. Eliot

I'll admit that I was a little confused when I first read this and had to go back and reread it a little slower - but after I did I was glad for that extra effort (11:30pm is late for me!). And considering how much I hate moving and the amount of time it takes for me to get over it I thought I should make a note of it. I used to love moving - what happened?!

Various Updates

2008-03-30T21:34:00.006-04:00

This is the first photo I've posted on my blog! It's not difficult of course but I've never bothered, and now our camera is broken so it'll be a while before I post another, but I came across this photo today and it made me yearn for spring. I actually took it last September in our front yard on Sunday afternoon after the kids had been skipping around and playing tag.

After a 13 year absence I have picked up my trumpet! It's really satisfying to be coming along relatively quickly. I don't have any of my old books or music but I have my little brother's "Foundations for Superior Performance" warm-up book and it's getting me back into shape. My lips are never sore, though after 20 minutes I can only get 4 measures out before pausing to rest my them. It's fun to be doing it again!

My window sill is FULL of seedlings and I am anxiously waiting out the 3 weeks until it's safe to plant everything outside, though I'll plant the peas and beans this week. Clarence loves having so many "growing things" in the house, which is helpful because I have been buying houseplants (usually the ones on sale) a lot lately. We now have five that I've just repotted into bigger pots and am looking at the empty spaces of our house, imagining plants to put there.

Most people know that my sister had her right leg amputated last December and has had a hard time with recovering - but I have some good news! She's finally healed completely and 31 March is her first appointment with the prosthetics people (sorry, don't know their technical name) so she will hopefully be walking again by this summer! She's been doing really well since coming home at the beginning of March and has no problems with the stairs in her house or with taking care of her 9 month old daughter (or the three older kids either). Laundry is a pain and so is running errands because she can't lift her wheel chair by herself, or carry her daughter downstairs and she hasn't tried driving yet (she has to learn to drive with her left foot - not a big deal but it's something she'll need to practice) but hopefully she will be able to do all of that soon!

More About Trees!

2008-01-07T22:52:00.000-05:00

After my posting this morning about the flowering trees I began to imagine all the mess associated with so many flowering trees and I no longer am terribly keen on the idea. So I wrote to Arbor Day Foundation and asked them to change my package to one with some maples and oaks and fewer flowering trees. I know you're on the edge of your seats so I'll let you know the outcome asap!

Trees!

2008-01-07T06:12:00.000-05:00

I know you're all concerned for our empty backyard (at least, if you read Clarence's blog you know that we cleared it of all trees but one) but I found the Arbor Day Foundation which besides being a reputible source, sends you 10 trees when you sign up, which only costs $10 (they're pretty small trees, actually). I'm going to give a few away, there's too many for our little yard and 2 of the trees are goldenrain trees which are very cool but drop a billion tiny paper lantern-like seeds onto your yard, best in a large landscape without garden beds nearby - I'm sure you can imagine the mess (not that the dead flowers aren't going to be messy when they drop off). They're flowering trees that will stay smallish and they'll get nice and full by the time we sell the house. I've also been toying with the idea of planting a Bing cherry tree (the best cherries, even in the grocery store) or a peach tree (there are a few that grow well here!) in the front yard. The flowering trees all bear little fruit so the critters we evicted last fall will have better food sources and eventually new homes (don't ask me how I'll keep them off the fruit I want to keep, it's an experiment so I haven't decided yet!). This should pacify my angry neighbors and also the homeless lady that scowled at me on the day of the razing.

Besides planting a few trees we'll be reseeding the grass, putting up a fence, ripping out the old overgrown hedge and planting something pretty in their place. I'll also try my hand a growing vegetables this year - we're going to experiment with growing all our own salad veggies to see what's involved with "living off the land" to a small degree. Most people know that my enthusiasm often wanes after a few weeks, so it'll be interesting to see how much I hate my yard by the end of the summer.

I can't wait to get planting!

The Fabulous Life and Times of Annie Tang

2007-11-13T14:59:00.001-05:00

I have entered the season of boogers. All of my kids have drippy, oozing noses. I think I'm going to gag. However, give me a runny nose over poopy panties anyday! Not that Lillian is all that bad - she almost always makes it to the potty for #1, but she cannot make herself #2 in the potty. She likes it to stay close to her I guess, sentimental or something. Whatever it is, I've started putting a diaper on her for about an hour in the middle of the day until she can let go of the emotional attachment.

On a more sanitary note, James is getting ready to crawl. He's rocking back and forth on his knees and doing a little army crawling across the floor. He's so chubby I thought it'd be harder for him but he seems to be moving along just fine! This means that he plays for a long time on his own - I actually got two scrapbook pages done today (it's been about 2 years since the last pages...)

Oh, and I'm throwing my first party since my Chapel Hill Poetry Club days! I'm nervous, it's been well over a year and I've never had a brunch buffet before. I also have a whole lot more house to consider this time - but that also means I can have a bigger party! Wee!

Gross Anatomy

2007-09-01T18:59:00.000-04:00

I originally posted this on my MySpace blog, but I know more people look here:

So Clarence, on top of doing his oral surgery stuff during the day, is also in Med school. Since he can't be in 2 places at once he watches the lectures via podcast every night to catch what he's missed. Tonight, while I'm getting ready for bed I hear, "...make a verticle incision along the pectoral or breast..." and I ask him, "is that showing a picture?!" He nods so I jump up and run over to look. There is a video of an old man cadaver (aka DEAD BODY) from the neck to the waist with a sort of grid on his chest. Then a gloved hand takes a scalpal and proceeds to CUT THIS MANS CHEST! There's no blood, I keep watching. The hand then picks up a corner of his flesh and pulls it back to reveal what looks like a layer of cold chicken fat. Nasty. But it looks like a chicken carcass. I keep watching. It then cuts to a shot of the scalpal cutting around this man's nipple and pulling the FLAP OF SKIN around it back as they cut. It's too much. I'm disgusted. They were actually, methodically cutting this man into parts. I ran to the computer to unload my revulsion into a blog, however horrified. blehg.

So I Married a Petty Criminal

2007-08-26T22:04:00.000-04:00

After being indirectly chastized for my infrequent postings I've been trying to think of something I've done recently that warrants a blog. I still have nothing, but Clarence did something out of character recently that still has me slightly aghast:

Before we found our home we lived in a sublet apartment. During this time we kept all of our belongings either in the living room or in the basement storage area, which only residents of the complex have access to. Our area was full so Clarence parked his winter bike next to all of the other stuff that was lining the walls, outside of the locked area. Well, of course, one day he went down to find his bike had been stolen. Ouch. The bike was cheap, about $50, but the studded tire was considerably more, to be used only on the icy roads of Edmonton. So we moved from our apartment having learned a lesson on protecting your personal property. Well. We left in our apartment a box spring and bed frame that had been left by the previous owners for our disposal. When we went back to get it we found the apt. had already been rented and the items were gone. No big deal, they were free. But the new tenants were in need of someone who could show them the laundry room and storage area and Clarence was happy to oblige. And while they were down there Clarence peeked into the storage "cages" to find his missing bike. He's quite certain about this. The bike was the same, the tire was the same, all the same scratches. It is his bike. It is also locked inside someone's storage cage. He decides to go around knocking on doors in hopes the thief will relenquish his hold on our bike, but no one answered their doors. He then came to a conclusion: another plan must be adopted. He decides his property is rightfully his own and must be recovered, by extreme measures. So he goes to the hardware store and buys two items. He uses one to cut the lock holding his bike hostage and the other to replace the lock. He then leaves a notes saying, "Took my bike back, bought you a new lock. Thanks." Now, I should not feel so impressed by my husbands audacity - he is definately confident enough to see no folly in a plan of his own making. However, to do something that could be construed as illegal? Well, this is out of character. So why am I so impressed?

Anyway, Clarence tells all the residents what he did and what do they balk at? Perhaps you have balked, too. Perhaps you already know that it was replacing the lock that was so shocking to his fellows, not the re-stealing of his bike. But consider that if he had simply cut the lock and stolen the bike back he would be little better than the original thief, with little regard for a person being acted against. I'm proud of him. Not just because it's incredibly cool to say you stole your stolen bike back, but because he cared enough about the dirty thief to replace the lock he ruined. My husband is cool. He'll beat up your husband any day. And then he'll help him to the emergency room.

Passing the threshold

2007-05-20T00:07:00.000-04:00

This week I taught Minn Va's Beehives (12-13 yr old girls) how to tie hemp bracelets. And, par usual, I didn't know before hand how to make them so again, par usual, I went to the library for help. I found a book authored by a man whose real passion lies in macrame but has had to switch to jewelry as macrame is no longer fashionable. Yet it was a good little book and it taught me well so I went into this activity feeling confident, though a little unsure of how to word my explanation of the basic knot that is a hemp bracelet (it's a square knot around filler cords, just in case you were wondering). So we get the lassies all set up and their cords taped to the table and I begin to explain the knot. They were of course a bit chatty, which made things difficult so I ended up going around to each girl and demonstrating to them individually. Then a Laurel (16-17 yr old girl) came in and looked at what one of them was doing, and told her she was doing it all wrong (I hadn't gotten to this girl yet) and gave her a quick little poem about a "P" and a rabbit hole as she showed her how to do it. Very siimple! I was glad she'd come in. But then I noticed all the Beehives had been quiet since she came in and we're all listening intently as she pointed out that if they used "these" beads their bracelets would look African - very cool. Then she expressed a wish to remain and play but had to get back to her own activity, and left. She was very nice. So we all went about our knotting until they came to putting on beads and I explained about 5 times (though there were only 3 girls) how you just thread on the bead and knot around it because they were chatting again. Then it struck me that I used to have the same power with the Young Women as the Laurel had, where they just think you're cool because your older and cherish every word you say. Even a year ago! But something has happened to make me seem much older now. I'm TOO much older than they are. I'm no longer innately cool! I keep recalling the words of one of my YWs leaders, "I'm still 21, only my body has gotten older." Maybe it's the 4th kid, or the 30 extra lbs I put on during this last gestation, or that I just can't bring myself to tuck my jeans into my boots. Whatever it is I've passed the Cool Young Married stage and am wondering what I've passed into. I think I'm prime for an early midlife crisis!

I'm an idiot

2007-04-03T00:49:00.000-04:00

I'm realizing now that I should have posted this earlier in the day because anytime I post after 10pm I do more complaining than anything else. But it can't be helped now, I'm the main care-giver again and have no time during the day so bear with me.

In honor of my first day back as #1 parent I decided to go to the mall to buy new church clothes for all the kids. We started off with a fun lunch at McDonald's Playplace, not something we do very often! Then we parked at the Sears in West Ed Mall and browsed their dressy clothes. It took me nearly an hour (including time for potty breaks) to decide that their suits were going to be unacceptable but James was behaving so we kept looking. I only had to go to one more store to find almost everything we needed. Again, somehow it took us almost 2 hours to pick out suits, socks, shoes, a dress with a cardigan which I am taking back because now I don't like it, tights and girly shoes. I'm really excited for how spiffy they look in their outfits, but am so sore from standing up with James tied to my belly and pushing a big stroller for 3 hours that I had to take some pain medication to easy the ache in my lower abdomen. All this and I still have no pants or shirt to go under the cardigan I knit for James (I think Clarence posted a picture on James' blog). The lady tried to sell me a christening outfit but it wasn't my style (the pants had pleats!).

Anyways, tomorrow I plan to take it as easy as they'll let me. I have very little hope of getting much rest anymore.

My Surrogate Chinese MaMa

2007-03-24T22:31:00.000-04:00

I've acquired a stand-in mom! She just had her own baby a few months ago and she's not really old enough to be my mother, but maybe my older sister. She and her husband are from mainland China and she's been giving me a diet that is fitting a post-surgery mom in China. The first thing was a soup that I think tasted like watery graham crackers. It was sweet, with lychees, barley and two other things I didn't recognize, which she said everyone in China has to eat for a week whether they like it or not after having a baby because it is so good for you. (maybe Mom and Dad Tang know what it is? Her english is still developing and I have NO Mandarin skills.) It doesn't taste that bad, but I'm certainly glad I don't live in China, though I ate it with gusto because she is so adamant about how good it is for me. And next she brought me some red bean jok with the same unrecognizable orange pods as in the soup, along with some little round breads. This was especially welcome because Clarence and I love red bean jok! She brought some pot stickers over for the kids and Clarence, but said I was too close to surgery and wasn't allowed to have any. (I did sneak a couple... how could I let potstickers in the house without eating any?!) And in a few days she's coming over to make wonton soup with a special ingredient for me while Clarence has to work in the morning. Her father is a doctor and mother is a nurse over in China so I'm getting the diet her parents insisted on her. It's the next best thing to having our own mothers in town!

Post partum

2007-03-24T14:15:00.000-04:00

This is my favorite part of having a baby! I don't do anything but take care of Sweet Baby James and recover from surgery. So Clarence takes over as much as he can (which is quite a lot) and our friends and family fill in what cracks he allows to be left. And since James and I have been a little separated from everyone else, it sort of feels like we are our own mini family and are now merging back with Clarence and the kids.

This morning James was awake for a half hour so we took advantage of the time to let the kids hold him and play with him. He got a nearly full physical with the doctor toys (he also got his feet cut off) and was read two books by Isaac and Ethan. Lillian just wanted to hold him like her dolls and they ended by covering him with 2 blankets and bringing a bunch of dolls and soft toys for him to cuddle. They were so cute! Now that they've been able to play with him they want him awake all of the time and I have to watch to make sure they're not waking him on purpose. That's alright, though! In a few months they'll get more than they wished for when he becomes mobile and they have ANOTHER sibling to share their toys with. They also keep asking me if he can sleep in their room but I have to put them off for a few more weeks until we get a routine down. I'm glad they are taking to him well!

My recovery has gotten off to a great start, I even got to come home a full day early from the hospital and my incision is healing well. I have Steri-strips holding it closed (which are just glorified strips of tape) that Clarence thinks aren't doing a good enough job and so has offered to give me some stitches instead. He didn't have any equipment so he'll have to wait till the next time I have surgery to improve on the doctors' handiwork. Hopefully everything will continue in this way and I'll be back to normal in another few weeks.

Neighbors

2007-03-18T05:28:00.000-04:00

Why do my upstairs neighbors sleep during the day and fight during the night? Why do they take their fights outside to their balcony and swear at each other for an hour? Why do they have to do this two days before I really begin to lose sleep? Don't they know a pregnant woman can't get back to sleep when awoken like that? Jerks. And someone should tell them that rearranging furniture is something that should be done during the day. Oh, and their cigarette butts belong in the garbage, not our kids' lawn. Same with their beer cans, though that may be the guys on the top floor.

Still pregnant

2007-02-26T12:28:00.000-05:00

As I was telling my family's website this morning - At the end of every pregnancy I become envious of anyone not pregnant. I look at their non-bulging waists and buttoned coats and think of how they don't even know how lucky they are. I want to go shopping for clothes that go all the way down to my waist but can't a shirt that I won't wear after 4 weeks. And then there is trying to DO anything. I can't reach, sit, lay down, cook, wash dishes, sweep or help my kids get dressed without painful reminders of my enormous obstruction. I've started asking the kids to pick things up off the floor for me because not only is it impossible to bend over, but I've been so sedentary for the past 8 months that if I try to squat my legs can barely get me back up. Last night I couldn't even sleep with my sheet on because I'm so freaking hot. And I'm just realizing that I'm not really prepared for an infant, I don't even have a car seat! So I'll keep my mind off of my due date by preparing myself this week (there really isn't much we're missing) and then go back to my fruitless longing. My other babies came quicker than I thought they would, this "end watching" only last a week or two, this one has been going on a month already and I have 4 weeks to go. It must be because I know it'll never happen again. This is the end. No more pregnancies. I don't really believe it.